Friday, July 15, 2011

Sporadic Shorts

--If you need to show that you’re independent then you really aren’t.

--Cab drivers are the enemies of walking.

--An ambulance risks the lives of hundreds to save one.

--Environmentalists die everyday.

--If an angry woman enters a room full of loud and noisy men, they will immediately go quiet and possibly leave with their tails between their legs.

--If an angry man enters a room full of loud and noisy women, they will immediately start laughing their asses off and possibly eat him up alive if he maintains that attitude.

--Humans, and most probably ants, are the only species that suffer from traffic jams.

--You can never forget to sleep.

--If you keep bragging about how extremely unique you are then squeal from joy when you meet someone who shares a similar interest then you really aren’t that unique. 

--Atheists and firm believers are equally absurd. They both are sure of something no one alive can ever be sure of.

--Every scientific article about the conclusion of any study or discovery has the words “might” or “may” or “maybe”. These people are getting paid to add to the general confusion. 

--Once a brother, always a brother. 

--A surgeon is really nothing more than an overpaid plumber.

--Vegetarians originally wanted to come to this world as sheep, but life screwed them over.



6 comments:

  1. The last one is totally true.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The irony of the last one, is that if vegetarians had come as sheep, they were very likely to end up on the plates of non-vegetarians :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Every scientific article about the conclusion of any study or discovery has the words “might” or “may” or “maybe”. These people are getting paid to add to the general confusion.

    You're absolutely right! As a nutritionist i have to deal with this every time I read a new study! And add to that the contradictory articles that leave you wondering which conclusion to adopt!

    ReplyDelete

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